| Recently, I came across a tread in a forum that | | | | but we often give ourselves a bit more slack. We |
| stopped me dead in my tracks. It was about falling off. | | | | allow excuses for our own and our horse's behavior |
| One contributor complained that she fell of regularly, | | | | to hold us back, and then we use those same |
| sometimes even several times during a lesson. I was | | | | excuses to explain why we haven't become the |
| amazed; I couldn't quite figure it out. | | | | successful riders that we want to be. It's not surprising |
| Was she much younger than me to be able to allow | | | | that we try to go a little easier on ourselves since we |
| herself the luxury of falling out with such regularity and | | | | already feel pressured and overwhelmed by our |
| risk severe injury? Was she very good at falling, like a | | | | obligations and the expectations of others. |
| martial arts expert, so that she never got injured? | | | | Demanding the best from ourselves is not the same |
| Was each fall a real fall, or was she exaggerating the | | | | as expecting perfection or never being satisfied with |
| frequency and severity of her falls? I have seen "falls" | | | | our riding progress. It's not about being unreasonable |
| that can at best accurately be described as slip-offs, | | | | with ourselves or trying to push ourselves or our |
| where the only part of the rider that is injured is her | | | | horses beyond our true capabilities. Demanding the |
| pride. | | | | best from ourselves is about being honest about our |
| Falling off always results in injury, if not physically, then | | | | capabilities, about learning how to stretch our limits and |
| mentally. | | | | refusing to buy into excuses that limit our potential. |
| Maybe it has become a habit, for both horse and rider. | | | | Today, take a look at your own accomplishments, and |
| Maybe it is by now even a form of communication | | | | assess your and your horse's true strengths. Have |
| between them. And where does the instructor come | | | | you been pushing yourself as hard as you can? Or |
| into all this, allowing it to go on? I was under the | | | | have you been slacking off because it seems like too |
| impression that a horse that dumps a rider regularly is | | | | much work to step out of your comfort zone? Has |
| a seriously disrespectful horse and that this sort of | | | | falling of become such a habit that it forms part of |
| behavior should not be allowed to continue. | | | | your comfort zone? |
| I may be wrong, but it seems to me that this rider | | | | If you are honest with yourself, you may realize that |
| allows her horse to walk all over her, risking injury to | | | | you have not been pushing yourself as hard as you |
| both herself and her horse. | | | | can, and therefore you haven't accomplished as much |
| So often, we replicate the way we behave amongst | | | | as you are truly capable of. Changing this is as simple |
| other people in the way we behave towards our | | | | as demanding the best from yourself, starting right |
| horses. If we allow other people to take advantage of | | | | now. |
| us, because we lack self-respect, we allow our horse | | | | It all boils down to a lack of self-esteem and |
| to do so too. Except in the latter case, we risk serious | | | | self-confidence. Riders, who have lost their riding |
| injury; mentally and physically. | | | | confidence for whatever reason, should work on it |
| Tackling this problem will not be an easy exercise. | | | | pro-actively. Although there are many books available |
| Firstly, the rider should understand that she should allow | | | | on the subject, it is difficult to increase our |
| nothing but the most respectful behavior from her | | | | self-confidence all in one go. It is better to do so |
| horse (as well as from everyone else), because she | | | | gradually. An equestrian self-confidence e-course, |
| deserves it. And secondly, she should demand only the | | | | spread out over several weeks, in combination with a |
| very best performance from herself. | | | | reputable horse training e-course, will allow both you |
| We're really good at demanding the best from others, | | | | and your horse to adapt in your own good time. |